An Office Update

Coming back to work after my materity leave was not easy. The first day was a lot of crying, on my part, only consoled by a warm welcome from my coworkers (they even cleaned the microwave for my arrival). I always keep my work space clean and I try to keep it decorated with being cluttered and over the top. I have brought in plants for my office and the common spaces. I bought some Ansel Adams prints on sale at art.com for our common space, the plain white walls made me crazy when I started two years ago.  I organized the library, supply closet, files and tables. It is so much better now.  I swear a lined up stapler and tape dispenser, a few prints, a few plants and a pretty tissue box does wonders. #beautify

I share my office and another attorney, who is the best and tolerates my putzing and decorating. He made sure people didn't dump on my desk so I didn't return to a mess but, my photos needed a refreshing and I need to make a few changes. While on my leave I kept seeing gold desk accents but I didn't want to spend my money when I have work issued items. So what did I do? I bought a 3 dollar can of Rustoleum metallic gold spray paint and took my items home. (Note: I have a job that doesn't care and I didn't interfere with the function of these items. They are theirs so if I leave the now gold items stay).  Here's some shots of my workspace now. Its a lot better for me, things that didn't match are now gold and shiny and feminine. Its a lot easier to leave my beautiful baby when I'm in a workspace that doesn't make miserable.

 

I was worried the gold would clash with my silver frames but I like it. Its bright and feminine. Everyone comments on how nice my office is :)

 

An old pier one pillow I had in my home office that I never use.

The flower pot was from an orchid that I killed (my green thumb does not work on orchids and violets, I over love them). The flowers are flower pens I made at home: thin duck tape, faux flowers from something and some purple pens.

These are much better than the standard black.

A painted letter I don't use in my home décor anymore. I hyphenated my name but go by my husbands in my private life and my maiden name at work.

These are dollar frames I bought at Michaels and just found some free vintage printables online. The hooks were all different colors but the gold makes it look more sophisticated and less like a dorm room.

So now my office is aqua (of course my signature color), pink, white and metallics.  And this little bit of effort really made coming back easier.

Toilet Overflow

This is basic knowledge but, apparently people don't know this. If your toilet is overflowing, for whatever reason, turn the water off. How may you ask? (as SOOO many have when I give this advice) Next to the toilet usually towards the floor there is a handle on a pipe going into the tank turn it until its tight.

(I borrowed this image from another handy girl!)

 

 

You will know when its off because the water stops. If it will flush, flush it and there will be very little water left in the tank. if you need to plung or repair the 'stopper' in the tank or tighten the tank screws (yes there are some on the bottom of the tank and on some toilets need to be occasionally tighten), do so and then when whatever was wrong is fixed, turn the water back on. That is all. Your welcome ;)

Family Holiday

An old draft post that I am finally posting...This Easter I hosted my first joint family holiday. My husband and I have been together nine years, owned a home two years and been married for a year and a half. But, it took a little girl to bring our families together for the first joint holiday. To say I was all nerves was an understatement but it went surprisingly well. We come from families with very different traditions and attitudes. His family is quiet and more religious, my family is loud, crazy, and well less religious. I expected awkwardness but instead thanks to their common denominator, my daughter, there was surprising peace. Effortless chatter, smiles, pictures taken, it went well. No we didn't break out the good china like I wanted, no we didn't eat on time, yes my little cousins let the dogs out of the yard and clean up took two days but, still, overall it was a positive experience. Now we will see how future events go but we are off to a good start!

Lowing Expectations

Father's Day was yesterday, and like most holidays I envisioned a day of laughing, hanging out, and enjoying each others company. Instead, it was more a day of aggravation, burnt breakfast and overall disappointment. When I went to leave my father, whom we had spent the morning with, to go back home and meet up with my father-in-law, I apologized for how the morning had went. My father looked at me and said something that I have been thinking about since. He said "it was nice Aim, you need to stop worrying about it being perfect because it only wasn't perfect for you." He then told me that all he wanted was to spend time with the baby and me. Instead I spent the morning trying to print photos of memories, rather than making them. I was also upset that my husbands gift didn't arrive, even though I had ordered it with plenty of time, and at the end of the day realized all he wanted was me to watch TV on the couch with him.  Lesson learned.

Low on Expectations,

High on Love

 I need to stop worrying so much about things being perfect and rather than trying to obtain fanaticized moments I create and cannot actually obtain. This tendency is making all events in my life not seem up to par. And I do it in almost all aspects of my life: I don't make enough money, drive a nice enough car, live in a nice enough home, etc. Nothing is good enough because I want perfection. When really, I have a good job, a nice home, and a nice car. This is something I don't want to pass on to my child. I think a lot of us do this, we build something up in our minds and we are disappointed when it doesn't live up to it. we don't enjoy what we do have. I don't think I can stop being a perfectionist but I need to start taking breaks and see what is good in my life. Hope you can do the same.

 

 

Wedding Advice

Last year I married my husband after seven years of dating. Obviously, I had time to think about what I wanted in a wedding.  It also didn't hurt that I worked on a big catering hall all through high school and learned what worked and what didn't from that experience. It never is what you think but, it was gorgeous.  I get told regularly that it was one of the nicest weddings our guests attended, whenever I see family especially, and my friends ask for advice on their pending nuptials. So I decided to write down some of my advice. I'm sure I will add to this over time but here's my general rules about weddings.

Rule 1: It has to  be cohesive
Pinterest can be a common source of this problem. You see so many good ideas and want them all but in reality they just wont work together, or you cant make it look like the professional photographer and designer did. That's ok, pick the ones that work together and for your style.

You want buttons, peacock feathers and fur muffs - this was my friends plan, I told her pick two. Luckily she picked the feather and the buttons and we totally pulled it off with button bouquets, she didn't want any fresh flowers, and buttons in the center pieces.
You want beach, purple, and daisies- another friend- I said pick two she picked beach and purple and it was gorgeous (we used calla lilies that remind you of shells and orchids that were purple).
My wedding I wanted elegant, classic, garden/rustic. And I had to pick two. I gave up garden/rustic for my formal venue. It was worth it.


Rule 2: Follow the steps
Yes, you need to pick things in order. Start with an estimate of how many guests and then find a venue. Then pick a date (I don't recommend picking a date and then finding  a venue that can end in heartache).

Then go get your dress. Make sure it works with the venue/church. (If you have a church remember to decorate it. A little goes a long way but nothing is noticeable.)  For me it was formal and a big space, kind of over the top in a good way. So I picked a ball gown that flattered my figure. But when picking your dress remember the season. Summer and satin do NOT go together. just as chiffon and winter are awkward.

From the venue and the dress you can work on flowers and bridesmaid dresses. You want the flowers to be appropriate for your space, high ceilings, then some (not all) high centerpieces. Low ceilings, low centerpieces. oval tables, remember to decorate down the table. Round tables, extra candles or lengthened flowers might not be necessary.

The bridesmaid dresses should be similar in material (season appropriate) to your dress, try to find similar/ flattering necklines and remember the girls that are actually going to wear them. Is the color going to wash them out? Will there be a neckline that works for everyone or a few that will work? is the back too low, does anyone have something they are very self conscious about that you might want an option for? Try to order from the same shop so that the dye lot is the same but alterations can be done anywhere. (though always have the girls try the dresses on after alterations, one of my bridesmaids did not and didn't realize her zipper had been sewn in and was unusable- luckily my dad is great with thread [they got very close when he sewed her into her dress lol] and you couldn't tell when he was done.)

Rule 3: Select the right Vendors
Go to shows, ask around, talk to them to see if your personalities mesh. You have to deal with this people a lot.

The DJ will have the up-lighting if you want it, swag if you want it, and will basically set the tone. Same for a band. Make sure you get along with the DJ. make sure you tell them what you want when. We loved our DJ but we were very specific. We didn't want swag to de-class our wedding. We didn't want a lot of extra talking, we wanted to dance. We wanted the music to fade from music that appealed to all ages to younger/ more modern music for the younger guests that tend to stay to the end and have 'lightened' up by then thanks to the open bar. Trust me the older guests will keep dancing if they want to, they are also relaxed from the bar.
 

The florist has to get your vision and you have to trust theirs. My florist was known as the florist's florist. Other florists use him for their children's weddings. He totally got me. I didn't want anything looking like a funeral flower, I had enough of those in the year leading up to my wedding.  Just make sure you like and trust them. Otherwise it will be a source of stress.
 
The Photographer. The vendor you spend your day with. They need to get you, you need to get along. If you have a dog and they hate dogs, don't hire them. If their pictures from other weddings do look like what you want don't hire them. Sit and talk. Talk about what you like and don't. Ask weird personal stuff. If it works, then hire them. Photos are basically all you have when its over, you want them gorgeous but you don't want to look back and say 'omg I hated spending the day with them'.

Rule 4: Remember the Small Things
Do you want something special? a photo booth? ice cream bar? sliders and pizza at the end of the night?
 How important is food? You don't want to go too light on appetizers because a lot of people have held out for the food, and to look good in their dress.

Open bar? Beer and wine? Cash? Do the guests have a hint ahead of time so they have cash if they need it? is the facility strict on id's?
what about the hotel? Is it big enough? do you have transport between the venue and the hotel so not to risk everyone's safety?
 
Make sure the cake, the favors, the little things all go with your theme. Also don't pick junk/ tchotchkes as favors, its a waste of money and people throw them out. Pick something that is true to you and your theme and is something people can actually use. This attention to detail shows in the end. I know its a lot of detail and you will want to lose it when its the count down but, its worth it.




Rule 5: Remember yourself, your spouse and your family
 Figure out what traditions work for you and what don't and let your family know. You don't have to do them all but you might want some. And maybe there is something special that you didn't know about that you love or an opportunity to honor a lost loved one.

Get a little something for your spouse on the special day. It can be cuff links, socks, anything cute that shows that the day is still about you two.

Remember yourself. This is something I kind of forgot. Take time to enjoy your bridesmaids. Take a day or a half day before the wedding and get a message. Make sure you love your dress and makeup (take a photo of makeup and whatnot to know if it photographs well.) Its your day too, I focused a lot on my guests, there needs to be balance. This does not mean be a bridezilla- no one like her.
 
Rule 6 Remember.... :
Know that things will not go perfect the day of and at that point you can't control it. When its all over you might have some cake, old flowers, a ripped dress, and a photo album. That's about it.  But if you follow the steps, then you will have done your best and your guests will say the same to you, that it was one of the best weddings they ever attended!!!! And most importantly you will agree!


(Photos taken by Digital-weddings.com)

11 days and counting...

I am 11 days from my due date with my first child. Yes, I'm scared to death, excited and over this whole your body isn't your own thing. But, I can say that I have completed a daunting task at work and feel as though I can take my maternity leave without dumping a mess on my co-workers. Yes, this is what I worry about. WORK. In all senses of the word. Will I be able to keep up with my houseWORK (I'm a neat freak)? Will it be hard to be out of WORK so long? Will it be hard to come back to WORK? When will I be able to WORK out again (I love zumba)? Will the baby be too much WORK? Who knows.  I have taken care of kids in my family since I was 9, so can probably handle the baby, but not being able to do what I want to do and go and feel fulfilled career wise might be hard.

Pregnancy and Gardening Frustration

So I'm 5 1/2 months pregnant and have had a rough time with morning sickness- like didn't see the sun or my gardens this summer... it was rough. But, now I'm trying to deal with letting things be outside - basically because I'm not supposed to do stuff because you know I'm pregnant and all (and I injured myself lifting something that was too heavy, ugh). Pregnancy is all about telling me not to do stuff, not to eat stuff, etc. Not for me I can tell you that, my parents haven't been able to tell me what to do since I was 5. But I digress....

The other problem is that all my hard work outsides seems to be pointless because I live by the Pine Bush Preserve. which if anyone knows the capital region in NY they know that it means sand, not just sandy soil but basically a beach, and really acidic sand at that.




I didn't have the heart to post a sad picture of my yard so here is the sign for the preserve.


I love my white pines esp. in the long winter when I really need something green but, could do without the havoc it causes on my soil. I have successfully planted an acidic shade garden under the one pine (something everyone said was impossible and has been challenging but, I feel we are on the right track). But getting vines, split perennials and grass to thrive has been challenging to say the least. If I wanted moss, omg I'm great at growing that , or nothing at all, loose sand, perfect, but a nice green garden and grass forget it.

OK well if anyone reads this and has advise I'm all ears. if I come up with a solution I'll post it. otherwise another year I have to learn to live this a sad yard....