First Christmas

Hosting a holiday is always stressful. Even if you are someone like my mom who thrives on it.

This was the first Christmas hosted at my house because it was my little girls first Christmas. 

Now it should be known that I love the holiday season: the good will, the music, lights, and  the movies. I mean what's not to like? But the day I could live without, the fighting (which we avoided this year- a true Christmas miracle), the food prep, the need to buy buy buy, the mixing of family traditions (a delicate balance) and the mess! When it's all over I miss the season but, am relieved the day is done. I don't mean to say I don't love our families or appreciate all they do for us. I just feel stressed. 

The best  part this year though was the alone time my husband and I had with our little one and canine babies. 

The night before I felt sad. I wasn't going to wake up at my parents house and go get my siblings to open presents. A tradition we had continued into adulthood. I went to my husbands families church and I missed seeing my relatives and the older woman who always wears her Christmas hat. All of that melted away though when we opened our first presents from Santa. And while it was very stressful I'm glad we had everyone to our house to share in her first Christmas.

Christmas Decorating

This year when I went to take out my decorations, I noticed an additional bucket of decorations. What could be in there? well apparently when I was in a nesting phase of my pregnancy last year I bought/made more decorations. VERY unlike me. But, with a little one now, I guess she will enjoy all the extra sparkle...

I am hosting Christmas at my house this year and I am finding the thought of it stressful (especially since I am not a cook by any means. I mean, I like permanently damaged my finger from a hand blender on thanksgiving- guess I took the name too literally but I digress). I am trying to remind myself that it doesn't have to be a banquet... MOM and it doesn't have to be a formal dining experience with white gloves... MOTHER IN LAW. It just has to be good food and us all together to celebrate a holiday about family and of course my little girls first Christmas.

We will see how it goes.
Also note, that usually when I have a bunch of people coming I set to clean every corner and speck of dirt. That is not happening this holiday there is no time. The paint chips taped to the wall will not be replaced with new paint until after the holiday and my base boards may have some dog hair. It happens I guess that's motherhood talking....

Workout / Weight Slump

Slump is an understatement. I'm in the grand canyon. My weight has been something that I have struggled with, consciously, since I was five years old. I started dieting in the 5th grade and have had severe yo-yoing ever since. And not 5 lbs: down 75 up 90 down 90 up 100. Its awful for my body and my spirit.

I only gained 8 pound during my pregnancy but I started it in a heavy phase. My top pregnancy weight was the heaviest I have ever been. I am now only two pounds shy of that number and it makes me what to cry on a daily basis. (so much for breastfeeding shedding the pounds.)
Why do I keep bending my elbow? what does food give me that a fit body wouldn't?

I know how wonderful it is to be fit. People treat you differently, you feel fantastic and my health is generally better, plus I can show that I have some decent fashion sense- something I don't do when I'm 'hiding' in my fat clothes.

I keep trying to get motivated, apps, mean plans, gym membership and classes but I cant do it. Don't get me wrong I work out at least weekly (not enough I know but better than some of my skinny friends) and I am an active person. But I feel terrible about myself.

So in an effort to get motivated, I have been reading some fit mommy blogs and I have noticed a trend: running.
http://www.coffeecakeandcardio.com/
http://www.rungiarun.com/
http://www.happyfitmama.com/
http://www.foodfitnessandfamilyblog.com/
http://anothermotherrunner.com/

They all run. Personally, I love zumba. I have always loved to dance and I will not stop taking these classes as I swear by them. Even heavy, they have helped keep me fit. I zumba-ed the night I went into labor and as a result of my bi weekly classes I never held water in my ankles and truly believe handled labor better (even though I ended up needed a emergency C-section).  But I need to control my diet and lose the weight. And when I was my smallest, I ran, ALOT. So I am going to try to start again.

 NOW WHEN TO DO THAT.....

I work full time and my husband works two jobs. Time to myself is limited and my little one doesn't seem to understand that mommy can't hold her and play toys all the time.

In law school, I worked out after I did my homework/reading. Yes, I was a 11 pm gym rat. But now a days, with a infant who wakes for her morning feeding at 5, this night hawk schedule isn't working. That and by 11pm I'm just too tired and have too much to do to prep for the next day to go to the gym. And most nights my husband is still at work and I don't have someone to stay with the baby. So, reality is, I need to work out in the morning. I always said I never understood why people did that to themselves, but now I understand. They had to.

So I'm going back to my college and lawschool days, making myself a strict rise to bed schedule and starting morning workouts.

Wish me luck or maybe motivation? Because 5 am is SO EARLY to be running...

Diaper Rash Remedy

This is a problem that all mothers will face at some point. For us, it only started when our little one started antibiotics, thanks to a revolving cold caught at daycare. Every time she takes it she gets terrible diarrhea. Its not pretty but its true. The result, no matter how fast you address it, diaper rash.
There are a number of creams on the market, Desitin, Balmex, A&D to name a few but my favorite is a homemade remedy that my great grandmother used: "burnt" flour.

How to Prepare:
Take your baking flour (we always use regular flour, someone asked if you can use coconut flour I don't see why not but I have never tried it) and place it in a skillet on the stove. We use a cast iron one because that's what my great grandmother used. Supposedly its better, I'm not really sure if that's true. Using medium-high heat continually move the flour around in the skillet until its is a nice 'brown sugar' brown. Keep moving it to ensure that the flour doesn't actually burn (in which case it will get hard). This browning process removes anything that would contain bacteria and increases absorbency, or at least Grandma Ethel claimed. Store in a sealed container (we always use a glass sealed jar).

How to Use:
When you see diaper rash, or any redness pat this on to the effected area with a pouf. I use a inexpensive soft makeup pouf. This can be used in place of baby powder and with a cream but it works, in my opinion, best on its own. If, however, the effected area is very raw, I would apply some cream* for soothing and then the flour. I sometimes pat some into the diaper itself as well.

Be warned though, that when they wet their diaper its going to look like rust dust (if you have never heard this term, its what urine looks like in a baby diaper when the baby is dehydrated- common in newborns especially those that are breast fed).

If your child is enrolled in daycare or a outside caregiver, make sure you let them know that you are using this alternative so they are not alarmed when they see it in the diaper.

If your child is prone to diaper rash, this is safe enough to use daily. And there's no known issues with flour as there is with talc powder so its safe for baby girls!



* My daughter doesn't tolerate ointments well so A&D is out for us. My mom and most moms seem to prefer Johnson &Johnson Desitin but, I actually like the cream Balmex best. Its firmer, and stays on her skin longer for better protection.)

My favorite time of day

As a relatively new, working mom, finding time to just enjoy my baby is limited.  I mean we play, 'sing', I nurse her, feed her, change her, read to her, but all the while something is slightly distracting me. The phone is ringing, the dogs need to go out, I can see the mess on the counter in the kitchen. I try not to mentally bring my work home with me but that happens occasionally too.
But, bath time is just for us. She loved to take a bath, a ritual I started as part of our nighttime routine around three months in preparation of daycare. (I know in theory she's a baby and not really that dirty, but I want to clean the daycare germs/ dirt off of her.) We get clean but that is a relatively quick process. The real fun is the splashing, the playing with ducks and her boats, looking up at the light in awe, see the dogs lay down on the floor next to us just to keep an eye on their baby. The whole experience is the most relaxing and enjoyable time of my day. Lill's fussy time is nighttime but as soon as she gets in her bath she's all smiles.

I know as soon as she goes to sleep I will clean what needs it in the house, do laundry, watch a show (if I'm lucky), and prep for the next day but, during those minutes in the tub, I don't think about any of that. I just try to enjoy the ducks as much as she does.

Pumpkin spice and all things nice

It's a little early for me but the mood struck me. Orange has entered my house and we are looking ready for fall. My garden flag is changed, my scarcrow out and my pumpkins on display. 

Whenever I take it my seasonal decor, I thin out my stuff or at least consider whether I want to keep it. Holiday decor is still decor, a reflection of your home and your style. Some things have sentimental value and some things are just for looks. 

Regardless, you need to decide whenever you decorate your house whether the items make you happy and work in your home. I also always rearrange when I put things out. That makes old things feel new. Hope my  little tips help when decorating for the next changing season. 

Dried Spray Paint Removal from Clothes!

I had bought a few new things around mothers day as a getting ready to go back to work present. I hadn't really bought new things in a few years and my resistance to maternity clothes had ruined some of my favorite items. my wardrobe needed a refresh. One thing I bought was a bright pink shirt that I LOVED for this summer.

Now it should be noted that during this time I was also wrapping up some projects that I wanted done before I returned to work. One included metallic spray paint. Now I have several pairs of painting clothes but apparently I decided to do a touchup in my new pink shirt, the first time I wore it.... and I got some on it.. and I didn't realize it until it had been washed and put away and I went to wear it again. So now I have a nice new shirt with dried spray paint. I wanted to cry but I wasn't willing to admit defeat.

There laid my shirt for two days while I thought about this. I looked up cleaning techniques in my good housekeeping stain removal book (thanks mom) but that basically told me I was out of luck.
I decided that the shirt was already ruined what could I lose? That's when I got out the acetone nail polish remover. I put some on a cotton ball and blotted it onto the paint marks in an effort to soften it. I only left it on a minute and then rinsed it really well with warm water. Then I made a mixture that I found on Pinterest that is 2 parts hydrogen peroxide, 2 parts baking soda, one part Dawn dish soap. (this was a recipe to get the organic stains off of the collar and underarm of white shirts for my husband. I have since used it on towels, clothes, anything with a stain).I spooned some of this mixture onto my shirt, over the paint, and began rubbing the fabric together with vigor. (on whites and more durable fabric I use a scrub brush but I was afraid to on this fabric). I noticed it start to lighten. I then took my fingernail and rain it in the grain of the shirt and after a few minutes of vigorous rubbing and scratching the stain came almost completely off!!!  This entire process took me about 15-20 minutes. Because I was concerned that the hydrogen peroxide would bleach the shirt, I then put it right in the washing machine. And guess what? The fabric color and texture is intact and there is such a faint mark from the paint that only I see it ( I asked my mother and sister if they saw any stains and they did not.) Its really really faint.  So that's how you save a brand new shirt that was tainted by a rushed mother who forgot to change her clothes before she sprayed.
 Hope this helps!

Tough Carpet Stains

I wanted to share my secret to nice clean cream carpets. It will come as no surprise to anyone that has used it , and honestly who hasn't, its OxiClean. But the application is the secret here.
Let me go back a few years...
My husband has a knack for making a mess right as I'm headed to a funeral. Tears his pants, breaks something and in this particular case, decides that I'm wrong and its fine to use shoe polish in the house. Well the top flies off of the liquid polish and there is a huge black stain on my cream carpet. Not in the corner or by the door, right in the middle of the room.  I was already in tears over the loss of my grandfather but now I was in tears over my less that one year old carpet.
What should you do when you get a stain- act fast. What cant you do when you are heading to your grandfathers funeral? Stop to clean your carpet. So I used paper towels to soak up some of the excess and I had to leave the stain to set.
In the following days I tried all the conventional carpet cleaners, I shampooed, I used resolve, Woolite, I used head and shoulders (another of my go to cleaners). I tried everything, nothing took it out. I was about ready to call the carpet company to get it replaced when my uncle suggested OxiClean, which I had tried but not the way he suggested.

He told me to make a small bucket/bowl of hot water. Like as hot as my faucet would get it. then add double the OxiClean to the amount of water as suggested on the OxiCleanbox. With a scrub brush liberally apply the mixture to the stain and scrub with all your might, in every direction (don't just go left to right or up or down.) It takes a lot of elbow grease, so be ready. Periodically with a rag/ old towel rub the spot to get the excess water/dirt/stain source out of the carpet. Continue until stain in no longer apparent. Then use a clean rag/towel to rub the spot of excess water. Let dry. Then vacuum.

Let me tell you - this works! It took black shoe polish out of cream carpet. It takes set pet stains out. Pizza grease from my husbands friends when watching football on our big screen tv. You name it, it takes it out.

So while this is probably a cleaner you have worked with before, I hope this technique helps keep your carpets looking great for years to come.

*I have no relationship with OxiClean, this is not a sponsored post.

Diaper Bag Dilemma

When I was pregnant I was sure that my diaper bag would be a passing problem and that I would resume the use of my beautiful designer bags with haste. The reality is that the diaper bag is designed for more than diapers, it holds everything: bibs, toys, baby food, emergency formula for the longer than expected quick trip to the store, lip gloss, my clutch, cell phone, first aid kit, and yes stuff for a diaper change.

When I registered for my diaper bag I originally planned on picking a Vera Bradley bag. But, I wasn't sure I wanted to commit to a pattern and as of late I haven't been as happy with how the corners of my Vera bags have been wearing (they just don't make them like they used to); so in the end went for a less expensive more my 'style' carters bag. (Black, white turquoise what's not to like)


 I also received a JJ Cole bag (a brand I've been raving about).

After using both I have some critiques. The Carters bag- I wish the outside pocket that had the fold out changing pad would stay closed, basically you cant store anything in this pocket. Further I wish it had more interior pockets. JJ Cole is a great bag with a lot of pockets but the seams needed reinforcing. I still would recommend either depending on your price point, size requirements and style.

I subscribe to a few other blogs with new mommy's and one bag that has caught my eye is the petunia pickle bottom bags (some pictures below). At the time I thought these expensive bags were a waste of money, though really not more than a Vera Bradley bag. In retrospect, I may have underestimated the importance of the diaper bag.

We use the carters bag as our daycare bag as it seems to hold her day to day needs well. As with the numerous pockets of the JJ Cole holding my emergency items for our shopping trips for our around town travels. Is one brand better than another? One shape better than another? Must you have the most expensive bag? I can't answer these questions as I think its very personal. But, I will say this: you will carry this bag everywhere you take your child. Whether you like it or not. And, when you have bags of groceries, shopping bags, recycles/ garbage as your walking out the door, the dogs on a lease and a baby in your arms or in a carrier, you will no longer be willing to add your purse to the mix, at least I'm not. So pick wisely, you will use this bag long after your baby swing, rock n play, momaroo, and all the other highly researched items you purchased/ registered for. (Note I have a coach diaper bag that I've had for years and use as a briefcase type bag, it has held up well but I wasn't willing to let go of its use at work to return it to its creator's intended purpose)

Maybe this is a good place to splurge. Maybe you think I'm crazy and throw all your baby gear in a canvas tote. Either way, think about it because it will be something you use day in and day out for years to come.

PS- get a bottle cooler. You can thank me later.


UPDATE: I am having some issues with the durability of the jj-cole handles. The coating is coming off, very disappointing. I saw my friends this weekend with Vera diaper bags and I'm not wondering why I was so turned off. I noticed the piping on my newer Vera bags fraying but was it so bad? I just don't know. If someone has a recommendation, I'd surely take it. I also heard good things about pottery barn diaper bags but I don't have any first hand experience.
*I am not the owner of these images, they were found on Google images.

Poison Ivy Cure

Its poison ivy season here in New York and I thought I would share a old fashioned remedy. My great grandmother passed this down. Use Fels naptha laundry soap (a picture below), or as my family calls it 'the yellow soap', to wash yourself with after possible exposure. So instead of your bath bar/ liquid body wash, use this to wash with. Use the bar right on your skin I wouldn't recommend a washrag or a loofa.  I sometimes use this first and then my regular bath wash but, that's really a mental thing. You may have some dry skin from washing with the fels naptha too regularly but its better than poison ivy. I use it a lot, in fact I keep some in my shower all spring/summer because of my gardening habits.  I would assume this would work for poison oak, sumac and for those of us allergic to Virginia creeper.

If you already contracted poison ivy then dampen the area of the rash and rub the bar of soap on it. Don't rinse it off, let it flake off. Because this can be kind of gross looking and hard to leave alone, I recommend doing it at night closer to going to bed. The next day the rash will be dried up , the itching greatly reduced or not at all and the rash gone in a few days (it could be gone that day but if you scratched it the larger spots that opened need to heal). Poison ivy is just a allergic reaction to the plants oils. This bar is harsh so it helps to pull off/dry the oils on the skin causing the reaction.
Also, don't use lotion when you have poison ivy, because it holds the moisture/ oil that you need to dry up and can spread the rash.

An Office Update

Coming back to work after my materity leave was not easy. The first day was a lot of crying, on my part, only consoled by a warm welcome from my coworkers (they even cleaned the microwave for my arrival). I always keep my work space clean and I try to keep it decorated with being cluttered and over the top. I have brought in plants for my office and the common spaces. I bought some Ansel Adams prints on sale at art.com for our common space, the plain white walls made me crazy when I started two years ago.  I organized the library, supply closet, files and tables. It is so much better now.  I swear a lined up stapler and tape dispenser, a few prints, a few plants and a pretty tissue box does wonders. #beautify

I share my office and another attorney, who is the best and tolerates my putzing and decorating. He made sure people didn't dump on my desk so I didn't return to a mess but, my photos needed a refreshing and I need to make a few changes. While on my leave I kept seeing gold desk accents but I didn't want to spend my money when I have work issued items. So what did I do? I bought a 3 dollar can of Rustoleum metallic gold spray paint and took my items home. (Note: I have a job that doesn't care and I didn't interfere with the function of these items. They are theirs so if I leave the now gold items stay).  Here's some shots of my workspace now. Its a lot better for me, things that didn't match are now gold and shiny and feminine. Its a lot easier to leave my beautiful baby when I'm in a workspace that doesn't make miserable.

 

I was worried the gold would clash with my silver frames but I like it. Its bright and feminine. Everyone comments on how nice my office is :)

 

An old pier one pillow I had in my home office that I never use.

The flower pot was from an orchid that I killed (my green thumb does not work on orchids and violets, I over love them). The flowers are flower pens I made at home: thin duck tape, faux flowers from something and some purple pens.

These are much better than the standard black.

A painted letter I don't use in my home décor anymore. I hyphenated my name but go by my husbands in my private life and my maiden name at work.

These are dollar frames I bought at Michaels and just found some free vintage printables online. The hooks were all different colors but the gold makes it look more sophisticated and less like a dorm room.

So now my office is aqua (of course my signature color), pink, white and metallics.  And this little bit of effort really made coming back easier.

Toilet Overflow

This is basic knowledge but, apparently people don't know this. If your toilet is overflowing, for whatever reason, turn the water off. How may you ask? (as SOOO many have when I give this advice) Next to the toilet usually towards the floor there is a handle on a pipe going into the tank turn it until its tight.

(I borrowed this image from another handy girl!)

 

 

You will know when its off because the water stops. If it will flush, flush it and there will be very little water left in the tank. if you need to plung or repair the 'stopper' in the tank or tighten the tank screws (yes there are some on the bottom of the tank and on some toilets need to be occasionally tighten), do so and then when whatever was wrong is fixed, turn the water back on. That is all. Your welcome ;)

Family Holiday

An old draft post that I am finally posting...This Easter I hosted my first joint family holiday. My husband and I have been together nine years, owned a home two years and been married for a year and a half. But, it took a little girl to bring our families together for the first joint holiday. To say I was all nerves was an understatement but it went surprisingly well. We come from families with very different traditions and attitudes. His family is quiet and more religious, my family is loud, crazy, and well less religious. I expected awkwardness but instead thanks to their common denominator, my daughter, there was surprising peace. Effortless chatter, smiles, pictures taken, it went well. No we didn't break out the good china like I wanted, no we didn't eat on time, yes my little cousins let the dogs out of the yard and clean up took two days but, still, overall it was a positive experience. Now we will see how future events go but we are off to a good start!

Lowing Expectations

Father's Day was yesterday, and like most holidays I envisioned a day of laughing, hanging out, and enjoying each others company. Instead, it was more a day of aggravation, burnt breakfast and overall disappointment. When I went to leave my father, whom we had spent the morning with, to go back home and meet up with my father-in-law, I apologized for how the morning had went. My father looked at me and said something that I have been thinking about since. He said "it was nice Aim, you need to stop worrying about it being perfect because it only wasn't perfect for you." He then told me that all he wanted was to spend time with the baby and me. Instead I spent the morning trying to print photos of memories, rather than making them. I was also upset that my husbands gift didn't arrive, even though I had ordered it with plenty of time, and at the end of the day realized all he wanted was me to watch TV on the couch with him.  Lesson learned.

Low on Expectations,

High on Love

 I need to stop worrying so much about things being perfect and rather than trying to obtain fanaticized moments I create and cannot actually obtain. This tendency is making all events in my life not seem up to par. And I do it in almost all aspects of my life: I don't make enough money, drive a nice enough car, live in a nice enough home, etc. Nothing is good enough because I want perfection. When really, I have a good job, a nice home, and a nice car. This is something I don't want to pass on to my child. I think a lot of us do this, we build something up in our minds and we are disappointed when it doesn't live up to it. we don't enjoy what we do have. I don't think I can stop being a perfectionist but I need to start taking breaks and see what is good in my life. Hope you can do the same.

 

 

Wedding Advice

Last year I married my husband after seven years of dating. Obviously, I had time to think about what I wanted in a wedding.  It also didn't hurt that I worked on a big catering hall all through high school and learned what worked and what didn't from that experience. It never is what you think but, it was gorgeous.  I get told regularly that it was one of the nicest weddings our guests attended, whenever I see family especially, and my friends ask for advice on their pending nuptials. So I decided to write down some of my advice. I'm sure I will add to this over time but here's my general rules about weddings.

Rule 1: It has to  be cohesive
Pinterest can be a common source of this problem. You see so many good ideas and want them all but in reality they just wont work together, or you cant make it look like the professional photographer and designer did. That's ok, pick the ones that work together and for your style.

You want buttons, peacock feathers and fur muffs - this was my friends plan, I told her pick two. Luckily she picked the feather and the buttons and we totally pulled it off with button bouquets, she didn't want any fresh flowers, and buttons in the center pieces.
You want beach, purple, and daisies- another friend- I said pick two she picked beach and purple and it was gorgeous (we used calla lilies that remind you of shells and orchids that were purple).
My wedding I wanted elegant, classic, garden/rustic. And I had to pick two. I gave up garden/rustic for my formal venue. It was worth it.


Rule 2: Follow the steps
Yes, you need to pick things in order. Start with an estimate of how many guests and then find a venue. Then pick a date (I don't recommend picking a date and then finding  a venue that can end in heartache).

Then go get your dress. Make sure it works with the venue/church. (If you have a church remember to decorate it. A little goes a long way but nothing is noticeable.)  For me it was formal and a big space, kind of over the top in a good way. So I picked a ball gown that flattered my figure. But when picking your dress remember the season. Summer and satin do NOT go together. just as chiffon and winter are awkward.

From the venue and the dress you can work on flowers and bridesmaid dresses. You want the flowers to be appropriate for your space, high ceilings, then some (not all) high centerpieces. Low ceilings, low centerpieces. oval tables, remember to decorate down the table. Round tables, extra candles or lengthened flowers might not be necessary.

The bridesmaid dresses should be similar in material (season appropriate) to your dress, try to find similar/ flattering necklines and remember the girls that are actually going to wear them. Is the color going to wash them out? Will there be a neckline that works for everyone or a few that will work? is the back too low, does anyone have something they are very self conscious about that you might want an option for? Try to order from the same shop so that the dye lot is the same but alterations can be done anywhere. (though always have the girls try the dresses on after alterations, one of my bridesmaids did not and didn't realize her zipper had been sewn in and was unusable- luckily my dad is great with thread [they got very close when he sewed her into her dress lol] and you couldn't tell when he was done.)

Rule 3: Select the right Vendors
Go to shows, ask around, talk to them to see if your personalities mesh. You have to deal with this people a lot.

The DJ will have the up-lighting if you want it, swag if you want it, and will basically set the tone. Same for a band. Make sure you get along with the DJ. make sure you tell them what you want when. We loved our DJ but we were very specific. We didn't want swag to de-class our wedding. We didn't want a lot of extra talking, we wanted to dance. We wanted the music to fade from music that appealed to all ages to younger/ more modern music for the younger guests that tend to stay to the end and have 'lightened' up by then thanks to the open bar. Trust me the older guests will keep dancing if they want to, they are also relaxed from the bar.
 

The florist has to get your vision and you have to trust theirs. My florist was known as the florist's florist. Other florists use him for their children's weddings. He totally got me. I didn't want anything looking like a funeral flower, I had enough of those in the year leading up to my wedding.  Just make sure you like and trust them. Otherwise it will be a source of stress.
 
The Photographer. The vendor you spend your day with. They need to get you, you need to get along. If you have a dog and they hate dogs, don't hire them. If their pictures from other weddings do look like what you want don't hire them. Sit and talk. Talk about what you like and don't. Ask weird personal stuff. If it works, then hire them. Photos are basically all you have when its over, you want them gorgeous but you don't want to look back and say 'omg I hated spending the day with them'.

Rule 4: Remember the Small Things
Do you want something special? a photo booth? ice cream bar? sliders and pizza at the end of the night?
 How important is food? You don't want to go too light on appetizers because a lot of people have held out for the food, and to look good in their dress.

Open bar? Beer and wine? Cash? Do the guests have a hint ahead of time so they have cash if they need it? is the facility strict on id's?
what about the hotel? Is it big enough? do you have transport between the venue and the hotel so not to risk everyone's safety?
 
Make sure the cake, the favors, the little things all go with your theme. Also don't pick junk/ tchotchkes as favors, its a waste of money and people throw them out. Pick something that is true to you and your theme and is something people can actually use. This attention to detail shows in the end. I know its a lot of detail and you will want to lose it when its the count down but, its worth it.




Rule 5: Remember yourself, your spouse and your family
 Figure out what traditions work for you and what don't and let your family know. You don't have to do them all but you might want some. And maybe there is something special that you didn't know about that you love or an opportunity to honor a lost loved one.

Get a little something for your spouse on the special day. It can be cuff links, socks, anything cute that shows that the day is still about you two.

Remember yourself. This is something I kind of forgot. Take time to enjoy your bridesmaids. Take a day or a half day before the wedding and get a message. Make sure you love your dress and makeup (take a photo of makeup and whatnot to know if it photographs well.) Its your day too, I focused a lot on my guests, there needs to be balance. This does not mean be a bridezilla- no one like her.
 
Rule 6 Remember.... :
Know that things will not go perfect the day of and at that point you can't control it. When its all over you might have some cake, old flowers, a ripped dress, and a photo album. That's about it.  But if you follow the steps, then you will have done your best and your guests will say the same to you, that it was one of the best weddings they ever attended!!!! And most importantly you will agree!


(Photos taken by Digital-weddings.com)

11 days and counting...

I am 11 days from my due date with my first child. Yes, I'm scared to death, excited and over this whole your body isn't your own thing. But, I can say that I have completed a daunting task at work and feel as though I can take my maternity leave without dumping a mess on my co-workers. Yes, this is what I worry about. WORK. In all senses of the word. Will I be able to keep up with my houseWORK (I'm a neat freak)? Will it be hard to be out of WORK so long? Will it be hard to come back to WORK? When will I be able to WORK out again (I love zumba)? Will the baby be too much WORK? Who knows.  I have taken care of kids in my family since I was 9, so can probably handle the baby, but not being able to do what I want to do and go and feel fulfilled career wise might be hard.